Monday, March 14, 2011

Death of Jeans

(This post was inspired by a size 14 girl that walked by me when I was waiting to get the food I ordered ...I was discombobulated to say the least ; she totally "flabbergasted my equanimity)

A disturbing and horrific trend has come to my notice . I am sure you too have noticed it ; I speak of the death of jeans and the birth of jeggings. Yes . For all of u that do not know what jeggings are , Like my village alter-ego would call it, that shokoto that will hold onto ur body and make all ur bombom and thighs wobble and shake like water in a nylon bag.

Now that we are all on the same page , I (as some of u know), school in Ghana which is known for having women with bountiful behinds aka the ghanaian I.d card. For some reason, of recent, girls have started wearing jeggings with blouses 2 sizes too small for them ; I simply cannot hack the reasoning behind this. From the skinny, to the slim, to the curvy, to the plump, to the fat, to the very fat, to the obese. I know when girls see other girls that look good wearing some "fashionable" things, they automatically assume that it'll look nice on them .. And this, my darling woefully misguided females is not so.

It all started from skinny jeans ; After skinny jeans, girls started wearing tights and leggings under short dresses ; Then jeggings came out and all hell broke loose . So u think because its coloured blue and looks like jeans from afar its jeans ? Well its not and all u porky ...Yes, porky girls that wear jeggings with blouses that barely cover ur navels are doing the world a great dis-service by wearing this nonsense.

You think because u see size 4 girls wearing such you and ur size 14 self can wear it too ? Well u can't!! No matter how much we want to look like all the people we see on mtv and in style magazines, we can't overlook the fact that we are in Africa .. And "we don't do that here"..its not very decent looking . Apart from that, no one wants to see all ur cellulite jiggle and ur butt crack with all ur disgusting stretch marks. Just stop it ! How would u like it if you saw precious wearing a bikini?? Well ,you r in the same category so just respect urself and wear jeans or a top that'll cover your bum and celulite-afflicted thighs.

I know guys'll disagree with me kuz they like watching girls' bums shake ; But I don't think any reasonable guy would want his own girlfriend / sister parading around in jeggins and barely-there blouses ..

Anyway, the point of this post is ; jeans are not ur enemies... Jeggins are not jeans and u look like a mirror-less fat loaf of bread wearing jeggins and a tiny top .. Be sensible , cover ur bum and thighs with proper clothes. Thank you .. If u have any comments or disagreements, you can make them known.


  1. *sigh* this post was so mean. I actually felt bad for fat people :(

  2. Its not aimed at fat people ..its for people who don't know how to dress reasonably and decently ...if u come to my school, u'll understand

  3. This is influenced by yesterday's trend topic on twitter

  4. Actually no.. Its influenced by a girl larger than I am that wore (in public) jeggins and a t-shirt that barely covered the elastic band of her jeggings

  5. This is mean!!!
    Lol @ village alter-ego.
    But yes you have a point
    Too much vulgarity everywhere.
    Not everybody should be allowed to wear jeggings as jeans!
    - Ekene

  6. God bless u Ekene ..I know u witness what I'm talking about in this school daily ... Eez very bad

  7. Bahahaha! @Ekene "Vulgarity" well,Nike is right to an extent. And all we can do is fold our arms and hope and pray for the trend 2 pass. Bcos this is just the beginning.

  8. Lol @ this is just the beginning .. It sounds scary

  9. Nike y so Angry? just got bk from work to read this, a good laugh i must say

  10. I endorse this post. I've felt this way over and over. I also like that you were really blunt.

  11. Finally someone who feels my pain chei u shd com 2 lag jeggings and tank top is d order of d day even size 16 girls r not exempted. Lovely post

  12. Nikky,

    U got it ...right on point....

    i feel u..,.when i look around lagos....i just shake my head..

    well maybe i'm old skul

    (iyawo domestic terrorist)